Generally
Generally i say hello
but today i stood in silence
Generally i coward in fear
but today i walked towards the violence
Generally i shut them out
but today i heard them laugh
Generally i don't do this
but let them feel my wrath
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():
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"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not." - John Lennon
Why not me?
What the **** was wrong?
Why didn't you say yes,
When I asked you to prom?
Insecurities,
Filled my head
Am I fat?
Am I ugly?
Why couldn't you have said
Yes?
And she was a spring night,
Dismal and dazzling,
Infinite with those possibilities:
Both of what may, and never will,
happen. And her knife
carved the line between
Hope and Fear and believe me
Her knife was dull.
And she was an Autumn day.
All things dying and better for it,
and her business card read:
D I S C O U N T||R E D E M P T I O N
And so undervalued was the falling of her leaves
That all the trees turned red to
Match her slow, steady bleed-
all i want to do is play
the serenade of sleep
please be quiet, please be quiet
let me go the **** to sleep
i'm so tired.
nap while waiting
nap while working
nap while dead
not even a stopped pulse contains the drowsiness stuck in my head
my keyboard is a pillow and my speakers are the shouts
all i want is to be restful
all i need is to black out
my mouth is full of winsome lies -
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
those jokes
we say we want to breathe
i say i want to die
you see?
there are much better things to be
than caught in darkness and small tantrums;
whining teenage lust and action
"not like anybody else"
can't fathom
how we live without our bodies
real life is such a chore,
and why am i this way
when thinking
like a dying breath
forever
stuck always as myself
we're all such shallow swimming pools -
deep ends nobody travels to -
everybody, everywhere,
i'm wrong, we're wrong, i dare
it's freakish, (but) after so much pain
and more tears than a lifetime's rain
just maybe there's enough
to cure a chronic lack of trust
slits dripping shadowed red, drip drip
lit fatalism, dread, drip drip
clear tears may as well be salt
what bitter feelings? all my fault
my wall is plaster, i'm a fool
if i could
i'd be plaster too
my mouth is full of winsome lies -
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
Paper skin
Stretched so thin
Worn to the core
Can't take anymore
Needles poking,
And sticks prodding
It's a party to see who will tear through first
When will the skin rip and give them that for which they thirst?..
They long to see blood
They crave your tears
Overtaken by sickness and evil, they become your greatest fears.
The only way they can feel good is to make you feel worse
It's not human..
They're emotional vampires sucking you dry
Every mood they steal gives a temporary high
But answer me this,
How much longer will you feed their wasted life?
Shhhhhh! Be quiet!
Your visuals will hybridize the hybrid!
Champagne orifices give way to lightning
clouds, and opaque shrouds, walk across a trail made of sounds.
Loud,
Hollywood the holly's wood withering while we holler bout,
a colloring of collard greens locked inside a water shout.
Take a problem, a solvent and a solve it.
Integer inter the girl, inteher I'm into her.
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Subtle mist for each syllable
Each silent syllable brings up fantastic fables
Silent myths sap each subtle syllable
Mystic mazes hides fantastic stables
Where lies marble treasures.
Back to this world of marvels
I believe in either iambic meter or vessel
Such tantric feather disguised in damsel
Floating in ether
Trying to discover which formaldehyde is better.
so foolish to think
you'd be with somebody
when we are all born
disaffected and lonely
drink hemlock, get married
to yourself, or something
that kills off the sickness
and enlivens the loving
scream
to be heard
but nobody is listening
talk in hushed urgent tones
repeat a cycled thing
[bitter, meandering]
so many standard poems
nobody is listening
scream to be heard
but everybody's braying
like donkeys enamored
with sounds of their own making.
small ripples spread out
on the surface of my own personal lake
so many words shouting out
but nothing coherent or making me able to shake
this feeling of persistent
loneliness in everything I do
what fabulous consistence
10 parts depression and ninety parts you
push everyone away
i'm not ready, i say
too wounded and weary
disaffected and empty
too alone to be well
or alone to be well
too alone to be joined
or alone to be well
too alone to be well
too alone to be well
shouting the words until i fall
it's just the sudden realization,
you see,
of the fact that i love myself
but hate myself too much to admit it
what a relationship,
schizophrenic memories
dropping like rain from the sky into my brain and poisoning me
with loneliness
too alone to be well
too alone to be well
too alone [to be well]
alone
alone
lone
one
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
my mouth is full of winsome lies -
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
a life where the self comes second
isn't much of an individual
where is the individual in one who lives through others
how does one value human life
if they do not value their own
is that not hypocritical
is an introvert who lives through others
not a twisted existence
what a strange thing
and you can not un ring the bell
and go back to not caring
and living a comfortable
actual life
I stood still.
And some ghost in some
Quiet corner of unreality
Sang a bawdy song and boasted,
Drunken with indifferent glee
I stood like a man
Robbed of all clocks
I was frozen,
Every bit as irrelevant
As the last words of every god
And I stood,
And finally, my brain whirred
Back into being-
And I stood against the minutes
That refused to live.
And I stood
Against the colors
Against the lines
Against the angles
Against the atoms
That composed a world
Where I could stand,
And like a man in
A "twilight zone" re-run,
I stood alone in my zen sanctuary,
Blind to the ugliness and
Blind to the hate
And to the fear
And to the sorrow
And to the guilt
And to the vile, towering history
Of all that should not have been;
And I was blind to it;
And that fact alone left me
Searching for glasses that
No longer exist
Have you ever felt,
The feeling of regret
When looking in the newspaper,
And hearing of the death,
Of someone you knew,
Doesn't have to be a friend,
Just an acquaintance,
Someone who met their end,
And in the end you think,
About an untimely death,
What if my next exhale,
Was my last breath?
Did I accomplish enough?
Will people be mourning?
Or will you just read the obituary
In the newspaper,
The next morning.
I sit alone and the world goes black,
an angel without its wings,
why did the world turn it's back.
I'm left alone only to wander,
why i've been shot out of the sky with a morbid plunder.
Why did you go, you said you'd always behere,
and when i said it back it was without fear.
Without fear that you might be lying,
now i'm left here alone and crying.
I've lost my best friend... Everyday feels like the end.
Will she ever speak to me again, only time will tell.
So i guess til this day, i'm going through my own hell...
i'm so tired of rhyming and stating
everything that my mind just keeps braying
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah dying
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah crying.
but how to be direct when the whole point
is to first be closeted 'til you're sure?
how to make sense and be legitimate
in the statements you make when there's nothing
working; the understanding's not mature?
eventually you'd think there would be
an end to the horror - all paths must come
to some sort of resolution. So try
to be openminded, just let it be
just a little longer, abide, abide ...
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
my mouth is full of winsome lies -
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
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Join the Poetry Running Contest!
There are those who
Are hard to decipher
They speak in ciphers
Follow no sign of discipline
Caveat Lector
Indulgence, Coherence
Pretentious nonsense
special thanks to sentimentgx4 for the sig
Pourquoi?
Generally i say hello
but today i stood in silence
Generally i coward in fear
but today i walked towards the violence
Generally i shut them out
but today i heard them laugh
Generally i don't do this
but let them feel my wrath
http://kersmtgalters.deviantart.com/
To buy some of my alters check out my ebay page and add me to your favorites here:http://myworld.ebay.com/queen_gothica13?_trksid=p2047675.l2559
Why not me?
What the **** was wrong?
Why didn't you say yes,
When I asked you to prom?
Insecurities,
Filled my head
Am I fat?
Am I ugly?
Why couldn't you have said
Yes?
My Mafia Stats - My Helpdesk
G Omnath, Locus of Mana U Arcum Dagsson BUG The Mimeoplasm GW Gaddock Teeg X Karn, Silver Golem
Dismal and dazzling,
Infinite with those possibilities:
Both of what may, and never will,
happen. And her knife
carved the line between
Hope and Fear and believe me
Her knife was dull.
And she was an Autumn day.
All things dying and better for it,
and her business card read:
That all the trees turned red to
Match her slow, steady bleed-
And all I could do was dream.
Join the Poetry Running Contest!
all i want to do is play
the serenade of sleep
please be quiet, please be quiet
let me go the **** to sleep
i'm so tired.
nap while waiting
nap while working
nap while dead
not even a stopped pulse contains the drowsiness stuck in my head
my keyboard is a pillow and my speakers are the shouts
all i want is to be restful
all i need is to black out
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
Join the Poetry Running Contest!
those jokes
we say we want to breathe
i say i want to die
you see?
there are much better things to be
than caught in darkness and small tantrums;
whining teenage lust and action
"not like anybody else"
can't fathom
how we live without our bodies
real life is such a chore,
and why am i this way
when thinking
like a dying breath
forever
stuck always as myself
we're all such shallow swimming pools -
deep ends nobody travels to -
everybody, everywhere,
i'm wrong, we're wrong, i dare
it's freakish, (but) after so much pain
and more tears than a lifetime's rain
just maybe there's enough
to cure a chronic lack of trust
slits dripping shadowed red, drip drip
lit fatalism, dread, drip drip
clear tears may as well be salt
what bitter feelings? all my fault
my wall is plaster, i'm a fool
if i could
i'd be plaster too
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
Ungrounded adoration
Fails
under examination.
The bridge between you and me
falls away, fast and free.
Love gives way to gravity.
like pen pencil computer
sometimes prolific
sometimes a neuter
I- the black swan- carried down the river in woe,
found myself in fortune, by the grace of an unseen foe.
Plucked from the numbing waters of consecrated self-loathing,
And painted up so beautifly in dove-white tailored clothing.
Then perched so delicately atop a provacative plateu,
And soaked in the magesty of a cunningly handsome beau.
I was a dazzling fearless Totem, prancing high above,
Till the crows cawed and told me of this soiled farce called love.
They flew me high into the wind blowing denial from my eyes,
To the sight of my illicit beau, lashing a new love with his lies.
A corpse of faux white feathers floated down slowly to his side,
and the rain that poured upon them, were tears I could not hide.
"A charade", the crows bayed, to this deluded black swan,
Now- but a mockery to a beau who couldn't love just one.
A splash into the river, back to the endless flow of life's crux,
Just the outcast once again- in a sea of pretentious ducks.
http://kersmtgalters.deviantart.com/
To buy some of my alters check out my ebay page and add me to your favorites here:http://myworld.ebay.com/queen_gothica13?_trksid=p2047675.l2559
Paper skin
Stretched so thin
Worn to the core
Can't take anymore
Needles poking,
And sticks prodding
It's a party to see who will tear through first
When will the skin rip and give them that for which they thirst?..
They long to see blood
They crave your tears
Overtaken by sickness and evil, they become your greatest fears.
The only way they can feel good is to make you feel worse
It's not human..
They're emotional vampires sucking you dry
Every mood they steal gives a temporary high
But answer me this,
How much longer will you feed their wasted life?
Join the Poetry Running Contest!
Shhhhhh! Be quiet!
Your visuals will hybridize the hybrid!
Champagne orifices give way to lightning
clouds, and opaque shrouds, walk across a trail made of sounds.
Loud,
Hollywood the holly's wood withering while we holler bout,
a colloring of collard greens locked inside a water shout.
Take a problem, a solvent and a solve it.
Integer inter the girl, inteher I'm into her.
Wouldn't be the first time
I pointed a gun at a head
But this is the first time
It is my own blood that I will shead
Each silent syllable brings up fantastic fables
Silent myths sap each subtle syllable
Mystic mazes hides fantastic stables
Where lies marble treasures.
Back to this world of marvels
I believe in either iambic meter or vessel
Such tantric feather disguised in damsel
Floating in ether
Trying to discover which formaldehyde is better.
special thanks to sentimentgx4 for the sig
Pourquoi?
so foolish to think
you'd be with somebody
when we are all born
disaffected and lonely
drink hemlock, get married
to yourself, or something
that kills off the sickness
and enlivens the loving
scream
to be heard
but nobody is listening
talk in hushed urgent tones
repeat a cycled thing
[bitter, meandering]
so many standard poems
nobody is listening
scream to be heard
but everybody's braying
like donkeys enamored
with sounds of their own making.
small ripples spread out
on the surface of my own personal lake
so many words shouting out
but nothing coherent or making me able to shake
this feeling of persistent
loneliness in everything I do
what fabulous consistence
10 parts depression and ninety parts you
push everyone away
i'm not ready, i say
too wounded and weary
disaffected and empty
too alone to be well
or alone to be well
too alone to be joined
or alone to be well
too alone to be well
too alone to be well
shouting the words until i fall
it's just the sudden realization,
you see,
of the fact that i love myself
but hate myself too much to admit it
what a relationship,
schizophrenic memories
dropping like rain from the sky into my brain and poisoning me
with loneliness
too alone to be well
too alone to be well
too alone [to be well]
alone
alone
lone
one
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan
isn't much of an individual
where is the individual in one who lives through others
how does one value human life
if they do not value their own
is that not hypocritical
is an introvert who lives through others
not a twisted existence
what a strange thing
and you can not un ring the bell
and go back to not caring
and living a comfortable
actual life
unwashed
skin itches,
scratching
brings rashes.
untreated.
time passes.
soon a year,
nearly healed.
that's how my fear
of germs congealed
like pen pencil computer
sometimes prolific
sometimes a neuter
And some ghost in some
Quiet corner of unreality
Sang a bawdy song and boasted,
Drunken with indifferent glee
I stood like a man
Robbed of all clocks
I was frozen,
Every bit as irrelevant
As the last words of every god
And I stood,
And finally, my brain whirred
Back into being-
And I stood against the minutes
That refused to live.
And I stood
Against the colors
Against the lines
Against the angles
Against the atoms
That composed a world
Where I could stand,
And like a man in
A "twilight zone" re-run,
I stood alone in my zen sanctuary,
Blind to the ugliness and
Blind to the hate
And to the fear
And to the sorrow
And to the guilt
And to the vile, towering history
Of all that should not have been;
And I was blind to it;
And that fact alone left me
Searching for glasses that
No longer exist
And I stood against the standing
Join the Poetry Running Contest!
Have you ever felt,
The feeling of regret
When looking in the newspaper,
And hearing of the death,
Of someone you knew,
Doesn't have to be a friend,
Just an acquaintance,
Someone who met their end,
And in the end you think,
About an untimely death,
What if my next exhale,
Was my last breath?
Did I accomplish enough?
Will people be mourning?
Or will you just read the obituary
In the newspaper,
The next morning.
My Mafia Stats - My Helpdesk
G Omnath, Locus of Mana U Arcum Dagsson BUG The Mimeoplasm GW Gaddock Teeg X Karn, Silver Golem
I sit alone and the world goes black,
an angel without its wings,
why did the world turn it's back.
I'm left alone only to wander,
why i've been shot out of the sky with a morbid plunder.
Why did you go, you said you'd always behere,
and when i said it back it was without fear.
Without fear that you might be lying,
now i'm left here alone and crying.
I've lost my best friend... Everyday feels like the end.
Will she ever speak to me again, only time will tell.
So i guess til this day, i'm going through my own hell...
Avatar and Signature made by me.
Regular Decks:
Green Pauper - BlackDemons - White Soldiers - RU Spells - BU Mill
My Commanders:
Tibor, and Lumia - Savra, Queen of the Golgari
Off Topic:
My Music Gallery
Police chase
Fast break
Heart race
Leave no trace
Not the case
Don't embrace
Face to face
No space
Call me Ace
Made a trade
In the shade
Cascade
Touched the Blade
Betrayed
Had it made
Then I payed
Now afraid
Of the Charade
Bells chime
Life of crime
Out of time
Had to climb
Flip a dime
Lost my prime
Work part-time
Not sublime
It's fine
Hit the bar
Fled in a car
Left a scar
Shooting star
Went far
Light cigar
Now char
On par
So bizarre
What I said
Blood shed
And I fled
A book I read
Look ahead
So misled
So I plead
Went to bed
Did it all again
Join the Poetry Running Contest!
i'm so tired of rhyming and stating
everything that my mind just keeps braying
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah dying
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah crying.
but how to be direct when the whole point
is to first be closeted 'til you're sure?
how to make sense and be legitimate
in the statements you make when there's nothing
working; the understanding's not mature?
eventually you'd think there would be
an end to the horror - all paths must come
to some sort of resolution. So try
to be openminded, just let it be
just a little longer, abide, abide ...
and eyes are full of death besides
but luckily the soul is wise -
it sees beyond my blindness and
forced failure makes a better guise,
so as i come again alive,
it feels like life's a decent plan