Nemira is a custom set that I have been working on for a very very long time, possibly too long, and it's not even half-done. Diggity dang! My work ethic is completely shot, but this isn't work, so I'll take as long as I like on it. Hahahaha.
Mechanically, Nemira is interested in cards being put in graveyards, or not as the case may be:
Winnow(If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Swansong- COST: EFFECT. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
So obviously my cards want to be doing a lot of saccing/milling/discarding. Green also has a slightly odd interest in artifacts, but it makes sense in context, I swear.
Flavourfully, Nemira has a fairly ridiculous premise, however I am taking it about as seriously as is possible.
Lucy was one of the old-school brand of planeswalkers, able to create and destroy at a whim. She also happened to be six years old. With her godlike powers she crafted her own plane, made entirely of her number one interest in life: food.
The majority of Nemira, even the flora and fauna, is made of candy; cheese on toast and pools of chip fat make up the more tectonic regions, and two out of Nemira's four (originally three) races are edible (not that beings of flesh aren't edible, but you know what I mean).
The lepori, a race of marshmallow rabbits, inhabit what we would see as the plains of Nemira, wide fields of fondant flowers and cakes the size of airports. As you would expect from rabbits, they are close-knit and rather timid creatures who can however be possessed by a strange kind of nihilistic courage. They are prey rather than predators, but their intelligence evens the odds. Their primary colour is W.
The mergumi are the merfolk of Nemira, the only race with counterparts on other planes. They inhabit Nemira's largest and only sea, the Citron Sea, whose waters are actually fizzy lemonade. They also happen to be gummy sweets, hence the name. The fact they're constantly dissolving in their own environment makes mergumi inpulsive and curious, wanting to get as many experiences into their short lives as possible, which is why they tend towards R as well as U (every race on Nemira has individuals of every colour, although as their are only four races the mergumi tend to do double duty).
The wirechicks are unusual in that they're artifact creatures that happen to be green and Birds that happen to be flightless. They're scaled-up versions of those really cheap little Easter chick decorations. They also have a rather strange view of death, seeing it as merely something that happens rather than something to totally freak out about; a wirechick killing another without its consent is not abhorrent, merely impolite. Fortunately for their continuation, being made of metal they are rather difficult to kill anyway, and most wirechicks have a simple enjoyment of life that serves as a weak, accidental version of our survival instinct.
Ants are not native to Nemira at all. They come from another plane, one that was engulfed and devoured by an all-consuming force named Gremmas, and were guided to Nemira by a young planeswalker of their kind, K'ss'ka, whose ends are noble but means are questionable. Nemira is falling into the void, you see, and what K'ss'ka intends will defeat Gremmas is the only thing keeping it from collapsing entirely...
After that excess of words, I guess I got to show what I've got so far. None of these are final! This set is in no way completed, not even the ones I already have down. In addition, I apologize for the lack of formatting, I have it saved as a Wordpad file. I might go over it, but then again, I might not.
Cream Puff 3W
Creature- Elemental (C)
Flying
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
"Um... where did you get the milk?" -Merri, lepori glykomancer
2/3
Evanescing Caress 2W
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Flash
Enchanted creature has deathtouch.
If a creature dealt damage by enchanted creature this turn would be put into a graveyard, exile it instead. No touch could be so gentle as that which releases you.
Sugarform 1w
Enchantment- Aura
Enchant creature (C)
Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt by enchanted creature.
Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped or is dealt damage, enchanted creature's controller sacrifices it.
To be turned into pure sugar by the glykomancers' transformative magics is a lamentable fate for anybody. But an ant afflicted with such a hex is liable to be eaten by her own sisters.
Day of Mourning W
Sorcery (U)
Each player sacrifices a creature.
"The day my friend died was the worst day of my life... do ants have friends?" -Astrid, lepori knight
Martyred Knight ww
Creature- Rabbit Knight (U)
First strike
Swansong- W: Destroy target creature that dealt damage to Martyred Knight this turn. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
His tinfoil sword is sticky with syrup- some of it his own.
2/2
Astrid, Lonely Fighter 2WW
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Knight (R)
When Astrid, Lonely Fighter enters the battlefield, put a legendary 2/2 white Rabbit Knight creature token named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter onto the battlefield with "As long as you control no creatures named Astrid, Lonely Fighter, Tallulah gets +3/+3."
As long as you control no creatures named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter, Astrid gets +3/+3.
2/2
Gremmas's Consumption 3WW
Sorcery (R)
Destroy all creatures. They can't be regenerated.
Swansong- 2W: Return all creature cards from your graveyard to your hand. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
A world died, one light snuffed out among millions. But a spark remained, spiralling away, a multitude behind her.
Mistress of Masquerades 2WW
Creature- Merfolk Rogue Wizard (R)
Mistress of Masquerades can't be the target of spells and abilities your opponents control.
Aura cards you own have "Swansong- 2W: Return target Aura card from your graveyard to the battlefield." (Whenever an Aura card you own is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate its swansong ability. It can't target itself.)
She shapes others in her own image. Too bad she doesn't know what that is. 2/2
Smell of Repetition W
Enchantment (R)
Cards you own have winnow. They must be winnowed if able. (If a card you own would be put into a graveyard from anywhere, put it on top of your library instead.)
"I started thinking about what I had to do, and what I had to do was exactly the same thing I did before!" -Shem, lepori elder
Lucy the Capricious W
Planeswalker- Lucy (M)
+1: Sacrifice a permanent. You gain 4 life.
+2: Sacrifice two permanents. If at least one of them was red, Lucy the Capricious deals 4 damage to target creature or player.
+3: Sacrifice three permanents. If at least one of them was black or red, Lucy the Capricious deals 4 damage to target creature or player and you gain 4 life.
1
Acid Erosion U
Sorcery (C)
Look at the top card of each player's library. You may put any number of them into their owners' graveyards.
Draw a card.
The most wondrous artistry on Nemira is only seen by the mergumi, whose control over the Citron Sea's currents lets them create beautiful and delicate sculptures.
Bubble Babbler 2U
Creature- Merfolk Shaman (C)
T, 2U, Counter an instant or sorcery spell you control: Draw two cards.
The Citron Sea will never go flat. Clusters of carbon dioxide vents litter the ocean floor.
1/3
Candycopse Guerrilla 4U
Artifact Creature- Bird Warrior (C)
Shroud, winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.) Candycorpse Guerrilla is unblockable.
3/1
Drop Out 1U
Instant (C)
Put target creature that entered the battlefield this turn on top of its owner's library.
Swansong- U: Put the top three cards of target opponent's library into his or her graveyard. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
Glykomantic Rescaling 1U
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature is 3/3.
Whenever enchanted creature blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, that creature becomes 1/1 until end of turn. "You think you're so big and clever!"
"Clever, certainly."
Mergum Looter 2U
Creature- Merfolk Rogue (C)
T: Draw a card, then discard a card.
Swansong- U: Draw a card, then discard a card. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"...When you die, can I have your stuff? Oh, you already have..."
1/2
Coward's Enabler 1U
Creature- Rabbit Wizard (U)
Creature cards you own have "Swansong U: Return target creature you control to its owner's hand."(Whenever a creature card you own is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate its swansong ability.)
"Everyone deserves the right to an escape." 1/3
Memory Scramble 1U
Instant (U)
Counter target spell. Return a card in its controller's graveyard to his or her hand.
Lady Disaccha UUU
Legendary Creature- Merfolk Wizard (R)
Countered spells have winnow. (When a spell that's been countered would be put into a graveyard, its owner may put it on top of their library instead.)
U, T, Counter an instant spell you control: Counter target spell.
"Don't think twice... unless I tell you to."
1/3
Glykomantic Reconstitutor 1B
Creature- Rabbit Shaman (C)
Swansong- Discard a black card: Return a creature card from your graveyard to your hand. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Death need not be the end, not even for me. Why do my comrades loathe and fear this? It is no more abhorrent than any of our technologies, that we use without question."
2/1
Ingestion 1B
Instant (C)
Destroy target nonartifact creature.
The wirechicks are the only other creatures on Nemira the ants have reason to fear, although none know whether the ants avoid them for these reasons or simply because they are inedible.
Liquorice Lasher B
Creature- Skeleton Horror (C)
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Liquorice Lasher must be winnowed if able. It drags itself forward with spindly fingers, clawing its way up from the darkest pits of imagination.
2/1
Ravenous Hunger B
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has haste and lifelink.
Syrup Sapper 3B
Creature- Ant Shaman (C)
When Syrup Sapper comes into play, sacrifice a creature. Target player loses life equal to that creature's toughness and you gain that much life.
That which carries life through the body can also carry it away.
2/3
Mergum Mindsculptor 2B
Creature- Merfolk Wizard (U)
When Mergum Mindsculptor enters the battlefield, target player reveals his or her hand. Choose a card from it. That player discards that card.
Whenever Mergum Mindsculptor attacks, return target card from your graveyard to your hand. "The sculptor never adds to his work except in what he takes away."
1/1
Near-Death Experimenter 2B
Artifact Creature- Bird Wizard (U)
2B: Regenerate Near-Death Experimenter.
Whenever Near-Death Experimenter regenerates, draw a card.
He plays chicken with the end itself.
2/2
Spiteful Slayer BB
Creature- Ant Soldier (U)
First strike
Swansong- B: Destroy target creature that dealt damage to Spiteful Slayer this turn. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"We ants never became so successful by conceding to something as simple as death."
2/2
Bodies of Evidence 2BB
Enchantment (R)
Creature cards you own have winnow. (If a creature card you own would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
At the beginning of your draw step, draw an additional card.
Whenever you draw a card, reveal it. You lose life equal to its toughness.
Deathloop 2B
Sorcery (R)
Return target creature card from your graveyard to play. Then discard your hand.
"Many have died for us, but usually they stay dead. Why wouldn't they? There are hundreds like them." -K'ss'ka, ant vizier
K'ss'ka, Ant Vizier BB
Legendary Creature- Ant Advisor (R)
Whenever K'ss'ka, Ant Vizier attacks, each player sacrifices a permanent.
Swansong- XGG: Return X land cards from your graveyard to the battlefield. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
2/2
Mistress of Finales 2B
Artifact Creature- Bird Rogue Wizard (R)
Spells and abilities you play from a graveyard cost 1 less to play. "Don't fear death, or rage against it, but make it have been worth your while."
2/2
K'ss'ka of a Dead World BBB
Planeswalker- K'ss'ka (M)
+2: Sacrifice a permanent. Target player sacrifices a permanent.
-1: Put a 2/2 black Ant creature token into play.
-13: Each opponent with fewer cards in his or her graveyard than you loses the game.
3
Burnoff Blast 1R
Instant (C)
Burnoff Blast deals 3 damage to target creature or player. If that creature would leave the battlefield in this way, exile it.
Monatog 2R
Creature- Atog
R, Sacrifice a Mountain: Monatog gets +2/+2 until end of turn. Nemira has little tectonic activity- once a toast mountain is gone, it's gone forever. The monatogs neither know or care about this.
1/2
Mindless Soldier-Caste 1R
Creature- Ant Soldier Berserker (C)
Whenever Mindless Soldier-Caste attacks, sacrifice a permanent or discard a card. The muscles of their mandibles are so enormous there's no room in their head for a brain.
3/3
Phoenix Drop R
Instant (C)
Target creature gets +3/+0 and gains winnow until end of turn. (If that creature would be put into its owner's graveyard this turn, he or she may put it on top of their library instead.)
A molten blob of marshmallow filling wounds and burning foes.
Spitting Oil RR
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchanted creature has "R: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn" and "T: This creature deals 1 damage to target creature or player." "Apparently it's most dangerous when it's still. I wouldn't be staying still if I had a mouthful of boiling fat, though." -Meldo, lepori explorer
Triboluminescor 2R
Creature- Merfolk Shaman (C)
Swansong- Discard a red card: Triboluminescor deals 2 damage to target creature or player. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Her death was truly shocking. Truly."
2/2
Wirechick Invader-Scourge 2R
Artifact Creature- Bird Berserker (C)
Double strike (This creature deals both first-strike and regular combat damage.)
Wirechicks care more for their homes than for their lives. 1/1
Warren-Entrance Ambusher 2R
Creature- Rabbit Warrior (U)
When you draw Warren-Entrance Ambusher, you may reveal it and pay 2R. If you do, Warren-Entrance Ambusher deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
He crouches unseen in the night, the smoke irritating his eyes and the fire roasting his extremities. 3/1
Alexys, Artist Extraordinary 3RR
Legendary Creature- Merfolk Wizard (R)
R, Sacrifice a permanent: Draw a card.
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control no other nonland permanents, you may put any number of permanent cards from your hand onto the battlefield. He wishes he himself could be as beautiful as the images spinning in front of his eyes.
3/3
Caramelemental 6R
Creature- Elemental (R)
Trample
When Caramelemental is put into a graveyard from anywhere, return it to the battlefield if it dealt 4 or more damage to a player this turn.
Swansong- 4R: Caramelemental deals 4 damage to target player. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
6/1
Joyride 2R
Instant (R)
Gain control of target nonpermanent spell. It gains winnow (when it would be put into a graveyard, its owner may put it on top of their library instead). You may choose new targets for it.
"Don't worry. You can have it back when I'm done with it."
Mallowing Phoenix 3RRR
Creature- Phoenix (R)
Flying, haste
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
When Mallowing Phoenix is put into a graveyard from play, it deals 3 damage to each opponent and each creature they control.
Those who attacked it wouldn't have killed it if it had been able to resist its own spite.
3/3
Rarebit Rush XR
Sorcery (R)
Rarebit Rush deals X damage to target creature or player plus X if a Mountain card has been put into your graveyard from anywhere this turn.
Cheese is at its hottest when it's straight from the oven.
Scribble R
Instant (R)
Change the text of target permanent by replacing all instances of one color word with another or one basic land type with another.
The pinnacle of Lucy's tower is topped with a single crayon.
Gatog 1G
Creature- Atog (C)
Sacrifice an artifact: Gatog gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
Nemiran atogs are lean and vicious. By far their richest source of metal is capable of running away.
1/2
Kill the Unliving G
Instant (C)
Destroy target noncreature artifact or noncreature enchantment. Wirechicks have no fear of death, but they still enjoy life. To kill one without its permission is not abhorrent, merely impolite.
Present-Sight Seer 2G
Artifact Creature- Bird Druid Scout (C)
When Present-Sight Seer enters the battlefield, reveal the top three cards of your library. Put a creature or land card from among them into your hand and the rest into your graveyard.
Today is the mother of tomorrow. -Lepori proverb
2/2
Mergum Descriptor 1G
Creature- Merfolk Scout (C)
Islandwalk
All creatures able to block Mergum Descriptor do so.
"I'm gonna be chased, I'm gonna be eaten, oh, why is this my future?"
2/1
Metal Bones G
Artifact Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +2/+3. The wirechicks feel a vague sense of protectiveness towards the lepori. The lepori are soft.
Nestbuilding 1G
Sorcery (C)
Put two 1/1 green Bird artifact creature tokens into play. If an artifact creature was put into your graveyard from anywhere this turn, put three 1/1 green Bird artifact creature tokens into play instead.
Wirechick hatchlings are raised within a nest of their dead relatives. The highest honour a wirechick can bestow another is to will its corpse to that chick's family.
Scratch at the Dust 2G
Instant (C)
Reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a basic land card and put it into play. Put the other cards on the bottom of your library in any order.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Silver Scavengers 2GG
Artifact Creature- Bird Scout (C)
Vigilance
Silver Scavengers gets +1/+1 as long as an artifact card is in your graveyard.
"There is more metal in this world."
2/4
Soldier-Caste Extractor 4G
Creature- Ant Soldier Berserker (C)
Intimidate The wirechicks are masters of using the jungle to their advantage. The ants are masters of tearing it down.
4/3
Wirechick Knowledgician G
Artifact Creature- Bird Druid Advisor (C)
Swansong- 2G: Draw two cards. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Let me tell you which plants are safe to eat: all of them."
1/1
Candypillar 2G
Creature- Insect (U)
When Candypillar comes into play, each player puts a land they control on top of their library.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
The cocoon tastes like sugar, so the caterpillar tastes like aniseed.
1/1
Dropclaw Assassin 3G
Artifact Creature- Bird Assassin (U)
Flash, deathtouch
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
A wirechick are certainly capable of wounding an ant. The ants' own poison on her talons makes it a mortal wound.
1/1
Porcine Predator 2GG
Creature- Boar Beast (U)
Sacrifice a nonartifact creature: Porcine Predator gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
"If you're a beast who wants to feast, bite down hard and break your teeth." -Wirechick children's rhyme
3/3
Reimagine 2G
Sorcery (U)
Return target artifact or enchantment card from your graveyard to your hand.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
"I'm ain'tn't stuck in the past, I want to be there!"- Shem, lepori veteran
State of Nature 4G
Sorcery (U)
Draw cards equal to the number of artifacts in each player's graveyard.
Silverware tools are forgotten now, ignored by the ground they're buried in.
Sugar Rush XG
Sorcery (U)
Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn. You gain life equal to that creature's toughness.
When every plant and animal is made of the same stuff, the differences between predator and prey are muddled at best.
Gobblepounce 3GGG
Creature- Beast (R)
Shroud
Sacrifice a creature: Gobblepounce gets +2/+2 and loses shroud until end of turn.
The first you see of it is its insides.
6/6
Shem, Lepori Elder 3GG
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Advisor (R)
Permanent cards you own have winnow.
When Shem is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, shuffle your library if you didn’t activate its swansong ability.
Swansong- GG: Search your library for a permanent card and reveal it. Shuffle your library, then put that card on top of it.
2/2
Scion of Stumbling 2GUB
Legendary Creature- Bird Avatar (M)
Whenever an opponent casts a spell for the first time in a turn, counter that spell. That player sacrifices a permanent.
She does not trial, only error.
3/3
Scion of Succor 2RGW
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Avatar (M)
Whenever creature cards are put into a graveyard from anywhere, put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control. (If two or more creature cards are put in a graveyard at the same time, this ability triggers only only once.)
He does not feel, only comfort.
2/2
Scion of Surprise 2RWU
Legendary Creature- Merfolk Avatar (M)
Instant and sorceries you control have winnow. (If an instant or sorcery would be put into your graveyard after it's been cast, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Whenever an instant or sorcery card you own could have been winnowed but wasn't, draw a card.
She does not learn, only discover.
3/3
Scion of Selfishness 2UBR
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Avatar (M)
Whenever Scion of Selfishness attacks, you may gain control of target permanent. If you do, sacrifice a permanent.
He does not love, only lust.
3/3
#ra, Ant Queen 2BGW
Legendary Creature- Ant (M)
When #ra, Ant Queen enters the battlefield, put two 1/1 black Ant creature tokens into play.
T, Tap another untapped Ant you control, Sacrifice a permanent: Put two 1/1 black Ant creature tokens into play.
She does not add, only multiply.
2/2
Lonely Tine 2
Artifact- Equipment (C)
Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has "T, Unattach Lonely Tine: Lonely Tine deals 1 damage to target creature or player."
Equip 2
Aniseed Ball 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Aniseed Ball: Target creature gets -2/-2 until end of turn.
Swansong- 1G: Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Argh... ugh... blegh, that's nasty."
"You think? I quite like it."
Braindigger Teaspoon 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Braindigger Teaspoon: Target player discards a card at random.
Swansong- 1U: Draw a card. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
Brulee Torch 4
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Brulee Torch: Brulee Torch deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
Swansong- 1W: You gain 3 life. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
It caramelizes sugar beautifully, but the caramelized is too dead to notice.
Every Flavour Beans 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Every Flavour Beans: You gain 4 life.
Swansong- 1B: Draw two cards. You lose 4 life. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Want to know what it tastes like? No, you don't."
Gingersnap Palisade 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Gingersnap Palisade: Creatures you control get +0/+1 until end of turn.
Swansong- 1R: Gingersnap Palisade deals 1 damage to each creature. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
Icing Bag 4
Artifact (U)
T: You may put a land card from your hand onto the battlefield tapped. If you do, draw a card.
Its beautiful patterns grace the terrain and bring inspiration from artistry.
Ubiquitous Gobstopper 3
Artifact (R)
Spells cost 1 more to cast.
Activated abilities of creatures and planeswalkers cost 1 more to activate.
You hold it in your eye, you hold it in your mouth. It jams itself down your throat without ever leaving its place.
Glutton's Galero 4
Artifact- Equipment (M)
Sacrifice a land: Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and gains trample until end of turn.
Sacrifice a creature: Equipped creature gains lifelink until end of turn.
Sacrifice another artifact or enchantment: Until end of turn, equipped creature can’t be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.
Equip 0
Sprinkle Factory
Land (C)
T: Add 1 to your mana pool.
T: Sacrifice Sprinkle Factory: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Confectionery Coast
Land (R)
Sacrifice Confectionery Coast and another untapped land: Search your library for a Plains card and an Island card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Islets of ice-cream, sands of sugar.
Cocoa Channel
Land (R)
Sacrifice Cocoa Channel and another untapped land: Search your library for an Island card and a Swamp card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
A delta of darkly delicious delight.
Caquelon Caldera
Land (R)
Sacrifice Caquelon Caldera and another untapped land: Search your library for a Swamp card and a Mountain card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Bits of burnt bread bob in a bubbling bowl of boiling brie.
Caramel Canyon
Land (R)
Sacrifice Caramel Canyon and another untapped land: Search your library for a Mountain card and a Forest card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Brûlée blowtorched by blistering breath.
Candycane Copse
Land (R)
Sacrifice Candycane Copse and another untapped land: Search your library for a Forest card and a Plains card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Fluffy forests of 'floss fade into fondant fields of flowers.
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
I would really like to be able to 'wean' the flavour off Magic the Gathering ideas and terminology and write a stand-alone story about it, because it worries me that I'm putting so much creative effort into a custom set of a collectable card game, but I can think about that later.
Monatog 2R
Creature- Atog
R, Sacrifice a Mountain: Monatog gets +2/+2 until end of turn. Nemira has little tectonic activity- once a toast mountain is gone, it's gone forever. The monatogs neither know or care about this.
1/2
Phoenix Drop R
Instant (C)
Target creature gets +3/+0 and gains winnow until end of turn. (If that creature would be put into its owner's graveyard this turn, he or she may put it on top of their library instead.)
A molten blob of marshmallow filling wounds and burning foes.
Wirechick Invader-Scourge 2R
Artifact Creature- Bird Berserker (C)
Double strike (This creature deals both first-strike and regular combat damage.)
Wirechicks care more for their homes than for their lives. 1/1
No common creature in Magic has been printed with straight-up double strike as of yet. For good reason?
Anyway, the only reason I'm doing so badly at designing this is because I can't be bothered to do more than like three cards at once, but this does mean that I'm more than halfway done. Very nice!
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Hi. I'm working on a food set too, currently titled Magic: The Gourmet.
Here's a sample:
ATTACHMENTS
Pickle Puss
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The Bailout Mascot
The government announced today that it is changing it's national symbol to a condom because it more acurately reflects the governments political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed.
Damn, it just doesn't get more accurate than that!
As ridiculous as it sounds, this is actually a serious enterprise, and this is my thread, so take your joke cards out of here, thanks.
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Day of Mourning W
Sorcery (U)
Each player sacrifices a creature.
"The day my friend died was the worst day of my life... do ants have friends?" -Astrid, lepori knight
White Innocent Blood? Is there anything I don't totally rule at?
Kill the Unliving G
Instant (C)
Destroy target noncreature artifact or noncreature enchantment. Wirechicks don't fear death, but they still enjoy life. To kill one without its permission is not abhorrent, merely impolite.
I'm not sure the second 'noncreature' is necessary, but I like to reduce confusion anyways. Hell, it's bound to come up at least once somewhere.
Astrid, Lonely Fighter 2WW
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Knight (R)
When Astrid, Lonely Fighter enters the battlefield, put a legendary 2/2 white Rabbit Knight creature token named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter onto the battlefield with "As long as you control no creatures named Astrid, Lonely Fighter, Tallulah gets +3/+3."
As long as you control no creatures named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter, Astrid gets +3/+3.
2/2
Holy crap that's a lot of words.
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Predictably, thanks to college this has been left by the wayside, but I still designed a couple cards.
Caramelemental 6R
Creature- Elemental (R)
Trample
When Caramelemental is put into a graveyard from anywhere, return it to the battlefield if it dealt 4 or more damage to a player this turn.
Swansong- 4R: Caramelemental deals 4 damage to target player. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
6/1
Metal Bones G
Artifact Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +2/+3. The wirechicks feel a vague sense of protectiveness towards the lepori. The lepori are soft.
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Man, this set seems pretty awesome. It would be funny if you used Devour as a mechanic, and perhaps fitting, too, considering the into-the-graveyard-matters theme.
Yes, this was something I had considered in the past, but early versions of this had brought back vanishing and I wouldn't have wanted to mix up counters. However, that's obviously no longer the case. Hmm.
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Warren-Entrance Ambusher 2R
Creature- Rabbit Warrior (U)
When you draw Warren-Entrance Ambusher, you may reveal it and pay 2R. If you do, Warren-Entrance Ambusher deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
He crouches unseen in the night, the smoke irritating his eyes and the fire roasting his extremities. 3/1
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Mistress of Masquerades 2WW
Creature- Merfolk Rogue Wizard (R)
Mistress of Masquerades can't be the target of spells and abilities your opponents control.
Auras you own have"Swansong- 2W: Return target Aura card from your graveyard to the battlefield." (Whenever an Aura you own is put into a graveyard fromanywhere, you may activate its swansong ability. It can't target itself.)
She shapes others in her own image. Too bad she doesn't know what that is. 2/2
What?!
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
Candycopse Guerrilla 4U
Artifact Creature- Bird Warrior (C)
Shroud, winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.) Candycorpse Guerrilla is unblockable.
3/1
Coward's Enabler 1U
Creature- Rabbit Wizard (U)
Creature cards you own have "Swansong U: Return target creature you control to its owner's hand."(Whenever a creature card you own is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate its swansong ability.)
"Everyone deserves the right to an escape." 1/3
Soldier-Caste Extractor 4G
Creature- Ant Soldier Berserker (C)
Intimidate The wirechicks are masters of using the jungle to their advantage. The ants are masters of tearing it down.
4/3
Glykomantic Rescaling 1U
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature is 3/3.
Whenever enchanted creature blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, that creature becomes 1/1 until end of turn. "You think you're so big and clever!"
"Clever, certainly."
Ravenous Hunger B
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has haste and lifelink.
Spitting Oil RR
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchanted creature has "R: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn" and "T: This creature deals 1 damage to target creature or player." "Apparently it's most dangerous when it's still. I wouldn't be staying still if I had a mouthful of boiling fat, though." -Meldo, lepori explorer
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
May I humbly suggest a creature type of black string licorice "skeletons" spawned from Lucy's nightmares for your black creatures. that nasty tasting @#$% is most definitely a spawn of evil.
May I humbly suggest a creature type of black string licorice "skeletons" spawned from Lucy's nightmares for your black creatures. that nasty tasting @#$% is most definitely a spawn of evil.
I actually really like this idea, mostly because I have a really cool mental image of them.
Liquorice Lasher B
Creature- Skeleton Horror (C)
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Liquorice Lasher must be winnowed if able. It drags itself forward with spindly fingers, clawing its way up from the darkest pits of imagination.
2/1
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Quote from Kroen »
I just proved beyong any doubt that your wording was wrong yet you insist to keep your flawed wording? You are by far the most horrible designer on this forum. Even Bankai would admit he's wrong when faced with such beyond-doubt proof. And that's saying something. You will have cards in your set. That are worded wrong. And you know they're worded wrong. Just because you won't admit you were wrong even though you and everyone else know you are wrong. Wow, just wow. Unbelievable.
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Mechanically, Nemira is interested in cards being put in graveyards, or not as the case may be:
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Swansong- COST: EFFECT. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
So obviously my cards want to be doing a lot of saccing/milling/discarding. Green also has a slightly odd interest in artifacts, but it makes sense in context, I swear.
Flavourfully, Nemira has a fairly ridiculous premise, however I am taking it about as seriously as is possible.
Lucy was one of the old-school brand of planeswalkers, able to create and destroy at a whim. She also happened to be six years old. With her godlike powers she crafted her own plane, made entirely of her number one interest in life: food.
The majority of Nemira, even the flora and fauna, is made of candy; cheese on toast and pools of chip fat make up the more tectonic regions, and two out of Nemira's four (originally three) races are edible (not that beings of flesh aren't edible, but you know what I mean).
The lepori, a race of marshmallow rabbits, inhabit what we would see as the plains of Nemira, wide fields of fondant flowers and cakes the size of airports. As you would expect from rabbits, they are close-knit and rather timid creatures who can however be possessed by a strange kind of nihilistic courage. They are prey rather than predators, but their intelligence evens the odds. Their primary colour is W.
The mergumi are the merfolk of Nemira, the only race with counterparts on other planes. They inhabit Nemira's largest and only sea, the Citron Sea, whose waters are actually fizzy lemonade. They also happen to be gummy sweets, hence the name. The fact they're constantly dissolving in their own environment makes mergumi inpulsive and curious, wanting to get as many experiences into their short lives as possible, which is why they tend towards R as well as U (every race on Nemira has individuals of every colour, although as their are only four races the mergumi tend to do double duty).
The wirechicks are unusual in that they're artifact creatures that happen to be green and Birds that happen to be flightless. They're scaled-up versions of those really cheap little Easter chick decorations. They also have a rather strange view of death, seeing it as merely something that happens rather than something to totally freak out about; a wirechick killing another without its consent is not abhorrent, merely impolite. Fortunately for their continuation, being made of metal they are rather difficult to kill anyway, and most wirechicks have a simple enjoyment of life that serves as a weak, accidental version of our survival instinct.
Ants are not native to Nemira at all. They come from another plane, one that was engulfed and devoured by an all-consuming force named Gremmas, and were guided to Nemira by a young planeswalker of their kind, K'ss'ka, whose ends are noble but means are questionable. Nemira is falling into the void, you see, and what K'ss'ka intends will defeat Gremmas is the only thing keeping it from collapsing entirely...
After that excess of words, I guess I got to show what I've got so far. None of these are final! This set is in no way completed, not even the ones I already have down. In addition, I apologize for the lack of formatting, I have it saved as a Wordpad file. I might go over it, but then again, I might not.
Creature- Elemental (C)
Flying
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
"Um... where did you get the milk?" -Merri, lepori glykomancer
2/3
Evanescing Caress 2W
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Flash
Enchanted creature has deathtouch.
If a creature dealt damage by enchanted creature this turn would be put into a graveyard, exile it instead.
No touch could be so gentle as that which releases you.
Sugarform 1w
Enchantment- Aura
Enchant creature (C)
Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt by enchanted creature.
Whenever enchanted creature becomes tapped or is dealt damage, enchanted creature's controller sacrifices it.
To be turned into pure sugar by the glykomancers' transformative magics is a lamentable fate for anybody. But an ant afflicted with such a hex is liable to be eaten by her own sisters.
Day of Mourning W
Sorcery (U)
Each player sacrifices a creature.
"The day my friend died was the worst day of my life... do ants have friends?" -Astrid, lepori knight
Martyred Knight ww
Creature- Rabbit Knight (U)
First strike
Swansong- W: Destroy target creature that dealt damage to Martyred Knight this turn. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
His tinfoil sword is sticky with syrup- some of it his own.
2/2
Astrid, Lonely Fighter 2WW
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Knight (R)
When Astrid, Lonely Fighter enters the battlefield, put a legendary 2/2 white Rabbit Knight creature token named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter onto the battlefield with "As long as you control no creatures named Astrid, Lonely Fighter, Tallulah gets +3/+3."
As long as you control no creatures named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter, Astrid gets +3/+3.
2/2
Gremmas's Consumption 3WW
Sorcery (R)
Destroy all creatures. They can't be regenerated.
Swansong- 2W: Return all creature cards from your graveyard to your hand. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
A world died, one light snuffed out among millions. But a spark remained, spiralling away, a multitude behind her.
Mistress of Masquerades 2WW
Creature- Merfolk Rogue Wizard (R)
Mistress of Masquerades can't be the target of spells and abilities your opponents control.
Aura cards you own have "Swansong- 2W: Return target Aura card from your graveyard to the battlefield." (Whenever an Aura card you own is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate its swansong ability. It can't target itself.)
She shapes others in her own image. Too bad she doesn't know what that is.
2/2
Smell of Repetition W
Enchantment (R)
Cards you own have winnow. They must be winnowed if able. (If a card you own would be put into a graveyard from anywhere, put it on top of your library instead.)
"I started thinking about what I had to do, and what I had to do was exactly the same thing I did before!" -Shem, lepori elder
Lucy the Capricious W
Planeswalker- Lucy (M)
+1: Sacrifice a permanent. You gain 4 life.
+2: Sacrifice two permanents. If at least one of them was red, Lucy the Capricious deals 4 damage to target creature or player.
+3: Sacrifice three permanents. If at least one of them was black or red, Lucy the Capricious deals 4 damage to target creature or player and you gain 4 life.
1
Sorcery (C)
Look at the top card of each player's library. You may put any number of them into their owners' graveyards.
Draw a card.
The most wondrous artistry on Nemira is only seen by the mergumi, whose control over the Citron Sea's currents lets them create beautiful and delicate sculptures.
Bubble Babbler 2U
Creature- Merfolk Shaman (C)
T, 2U, Counter an instant or sorcery spell you control: Draw two cards.
The Citron Sea will never go flat. Clusters of carbon dioxide vents litter the ocean floor.
1/3
Candycopse Guerrilla 4U
Artifact Creature- Bird Warrior (C)
Shroud, winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Candycorpse Guerrilla is unblockable.
3/1
Drop Out 1U
Instant (C)
Put target creature that entered the battlefield this turn on top of its owner's library.
Swansong- U: Put the top three cards of target opponent's library into his or her graveyard. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
Glykomantic Rescaling 1U
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature is 3/3.
Whenever enchanted creature blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, that creature becomes 1/1 until end of turn.
"You think you're so big and clever!"
"Clever, certainly."
Mergum Looter 2U
Creature- Merfolk Rogue (C)
T: Draw a card, then discard a card.
Swansong- U: Draw a card, then discard a card. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"...When you die, can I have your stuff? Oh, you already have..."
1/2
Coward's Enabler 1U
Creature- Rabbit Wizard (U)
Creature cards you own have "Swansong U: Return target creature you control to its owner's hand."(Whenever a creature card you own is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate its swansong ability.)
"Everyone deserves the right to an escape."
1/3
Memory Scramble 1U
Instant (U)
Counter target spell. Return a card in its controller's graveyard to his or her hand.
Lady Disaccha UUU
Legendary Creature- Merfolk Wizard (R)
Countered spells have winnow. (When a spell that's been countered would be put into a graveyard, its owner may put it on top of their library instead.)
U, T, Counter an instant spell you control: Counter target spell.
"Don't think twice... unless I tell you to."
1/3
Overflow 7U
Sorcery (R)
Draw eight cards.
"Whoops."
Creature- Rabbit Shaman (C)
Swansong- Discard a black card: Return a creature card from your graveyard to your hand. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Death need not be the end, not even for me. Why do my comrades loathe and fear this? It is no more abhorrent than any of our technologies, that we use without question."
2/1
Ingestion 1B
Instant (C)
Destroy target nonartifact creature.
The wirechicks are the only other creatures on Nemira the ants have reason to fear, although none know whether the ants avoid them for these reasons or simply because they are inedible.
Liquorice Lasher B
Creature- Skeleton Horror (C)
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Liquorice Lasher must be winnowed if able.
It drags itself forward with spindly fingers, clawing its way up from the darkest pits of imagination.
2/1
Ravenous Hunger B
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has haste and lifelink.
Syrup Sapper 3B
Creature- Ant Shaman (C)
When Syrup Sapper comes into play, sacrifice a creature. Target player loses life equal to that creature's toughness and you gain that much life.
That which carries life through the body can also carry it away.
2/3
Mergum Mindsculptor 2B
Creature- Merfolk Wizard (U)
When Mergum Mindsculptor enters the battlefield, target player reveals his or her hand. Choose a card from it. That player discards that card.
Whenever Mergum Mindsculptor attacks, return target card from your graveyard to your hand.
"The sculptor never adds to his work except in what he takes away."
1/1
Near-Death Experimenter 2B
Artifact Creature- Bird Wizard (U)
2B: Regenerate Near-Death Experimenter.
Whenever Near-Death Experimenter regenerates, draw a card.
He plays chicken with the end itself.
2/2
Spiteful Slayer BB
Creature- Ant Soldier (U)
First strike
Swansong- B: Destroy target creature that dealt damage to Spiteful Slayer this turn. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"We ants never became so successful by conceding to something as simple as death."
2/2
Bodies of Evidence 2BB
Enchantment (R)
Creature cards you own have winnow. (If a creature card you own would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
At the beginning of your draw step, draw an additional card.
Whenever you draw a card, reveal it. You lose life equal to its toughness.
Deathloop 2B
Sorcery (R)
Return target creature card from your graveyard to play. Then discard your hand.
"Many have died for us, but usually they stay dead. Why wouldn't they? There are hundreds like them." -K'ss'ka, ant vizier
K'ss'ka, Ant Vizier BB
Legendary Creature- Ant Advisor (R)
Whenever K'ss'ka, Ant Vizier attacks, each player sacrifices a permanent.
Swansong- XGG: Return X land cards from your graveyard to the battlefield. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
2/2
Mistress of Finales 2B
Artifact Creature- Bird Rogue Wizard (R)
Spells and abilities you play from a graveyard cost 1 less to play.
"Don't fear death, or rage against it, but make it have been worth your while."
2/2
K'ss'ka of a Dead World BBB
Planeswalker- K'ss'ka (M)
+2: Sacrifice a permanent. Target player sacrifices a permanent.
-1: Put a 2/2 black Ant creature token into play.
-13: Each opponent with fewer cards in his or her graveyard than you loses the game.
3
Burnoff Blast 1R
Instant (C)
Burnoff Blast deals 3 damage to target creature or player. If that creature would leave the battlefield in this way, exile it.
Monatog 2R
Creature- Atog
R, Sacrifice a Mountain: Monatog gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
Nemira has little tectonic activity- once a toast mountain is gone, it's gone forever. The monatogs neither know or care about this.
1/2
Mindless Soldier-Caste 1R
Creature- Ant Soldier Berserker (C)
Whenever Mindless Soldier-Caste attacks, sacrifice a permanent or discard a card.
The muscles of their mandibles are so enormous there's no room in their head for a brain.
3/3
Phoenix Drop R
Instant (C)
Target creature gets +3/+0 and gains winnow until end of turn. (If that creature would be put into its owner's graveyard this turn, he or she may put it on top of their library instead.)
A molten blob of marshmallow filling wounds and burning foes.
Spitting Oil RR
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchanted creature has "R: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn" and "T: This creature deals 1 damage to target creature or player."
"Apparently it's most dangerous when it's still. I wouldn't be staying still if I had a mouthful of boiling fat, though." -Meldo, lepori explorer
Triboluminescor 2R
Creature- Merfolk Shaman (C)
Swansong- Discard a red card: Triboluminescor deals 2 damage to target creature or player. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Her death was truly shocking. Truly."
2/2
Wirechick Invader-Scourge 2R
Artifact Creature- Bird Berserker (C)
Double strike (This creature deals both first-strike and regular combat damage.)
Wirechicks care more for their homes than for their lives.
1/1
Warren-Entrance Ambusher 2R
Creature- Rabbit Warrior (U)
When you draw Warren-Entrance Ambusher, you may reveal it and pay 2R. If you do, Warren-Entrance Ambusher deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
He crouches unseen in the night, the smoke irritating his eyes and the fire roasting his extremities.
3/1
Alexys, Artist Extraordinary 3RR
Legendary Creature- Merfolk Wizard (R)
R, Sacrifice a permanent: Draw a card.
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you control no other nonland permanents, you may put any number of permanent cards from your hand onto the battlefield.
He wishes he himself could be as beautiful as the images spinning in front of his eyes.
3/3
Caramelemental 6R
Creature- Elemental (R)
Trample
When Caramelemental is put into a graveyard from anywhere, return it to the battlefield if it dealt 4 or more damage to a player this turn.
Swansong- 4R: Caramelemental deals 4 damage to target player. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
6/1
Joyride 2R
Instant (R)
Gain control of target nonpermanent spell. It gains winnow (when it would be put into a graveyard, its owner may put it on top of their library instead). You may choose new targets for it.
"Don't worry. You can have it back when I'm done with it."
Mallowing Phoenix 3RRR
Creature- Phoenix (R)
Flying, haste
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
When Mallowing Phoenix is put into a graveyard from play, it deals 3 damage to each opponent and each creature they control.
Those who attacked it wouldn't have killed it if it had been able to resist its own spite.
3/3
Rarebit Rush XR
Sorcery (R)
Rarebit Rush deals X damage to target creature or player plus X if a Mountain card has been put into your graveyard from anywhere this turn.
Cheese is at its hottest when it's straight from the oven.
Scribble R
Instant (R)
Change the text of target permanent by replacing all instances of one color word with another or one basic land type with another.
The pinnacle of Lucy's tower is topped with a single crayon.
Gatog 1G
Creature- Atog (C)
Sacrifice an artifact: Gatog gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
Nemiran atogs are lean and vicious. By far their richest source of metal is capable of running away.
1/2
Kill the Unliving G
Instant (C)
Destroy target noncreature artifact or noncreature enchantment.
Wirechicks have no fear of death, but they still enjoy life. To kill one without its permission is not abhorrent, merely impolite.
Present-Sight Seer 2G
Artifact Creature- Bird Druid Scout (C)
When Present-Sight Seer enters the battlefield, reveal the top three cards of your library. Put a creature or land card from among them into your hand and the rest into your graveyard.
Today is the mother of tomorrow. -Lepori proverb
2/2
Mergum Descriptor 1G
Creature- Merfolk Scout (C)
Islandwalk
All creatures able to block Mergum Descriptor do so.
"I'm gonna be chased, I'm gonna be eaten, oh, why is this my future?"
2/1
Metal Bones G
Artifact Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +2/+3.
The wirechicks feel a vague sense of protectiveness towards the lepori. The lepori are soft.
Nestbuilding 1G
Sorcery (C)
Put two 1/1 green Bird artifact creature tokens into play. If an artifact creature was put into your graveyard from anywhere this turn, put three 1/1 green Bird artifact creature tokens into play instead.
Wirechick hatchlings are raised within a nest of their dead relatives. The highest honour a wirechick can bestow another is to will its corpse to that chick's family.
Scratch at the Dust 2G
Instant (C)
Reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a basic land card and put it into play. Put the other cards on the bottom of your library in any order.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Silver Scavengers 2GG
Artifact Creature- Bird Scout (C)
Vigilance
Silver Scavengers gets +1/+1 as long as an artifact card is in your graveyard.
"There is more metal in this world."
2/4
Soldier-Caste Extractor 4G
Creature- Ant Soldier Berserker (C)
Intimidate
The wirechicks are masters of using the jungle to their advantage. The ants are masters of tearing it down.
4/3
Wirechick Knowledgician G
Artifact Creature- Bird Druid Advisor (C)
Swansong- 2G: Draw two cards. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Let me tell you which plants are safe to eat: all of them."
1/1
Candypillar 2G
Creature- Insect (U)
When Candypillar comes into play, each player puts a land they control on top of their library.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
The cocoon tastes like sugar, so the caterpillar tastes like aniseed.
1/1
Dropclaw Assassin 3G
Artifact Creature- Bird Assassin (U)
Flash, deathtouch
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
A wirechick are certainly capable of wounding an ant. The ants' own poison on her talons makes it a mortal wound.
1/1
Porcine Predator 2GG
Creature- Boar Beast (U)
Sacrifice a nonartifact creature: Porcine Predator gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
"If you're a beast who wants to feast, bite down hard and break your teeth." -Wirechick children's rhyme
3/3
Reimagine 2G
Sorcery (U)
Return target artifact or enchantment card from your graveyard to your hand.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
"I'm ain'tn't stuck in the past, I want to be there!"- Shem, lepori veteran
State of Nature 4G
Sorcery (U)
Draw cards equal to the number of artifacts in each player's graveyard.
Silverware tools are forgotten now, ignored by the ground they're buried in.
Sugar Rush XG
Sorcery (U)
Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn. You gain life equal to that creature's toughness.
When every plant and animal is made of the same stuff, the differences between predator and prey are muddled at best.
Gobblepounce 3GGG
Creature- Beast (R)
Shroud
Sacrifice a creature: Gobblepounce gets +2/+2 and loses shroud until end of turn.
The first you see of it is its insides.
6/6
Shem, Lepori Elder 3GG
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Advisor (R)
Permanent cards you own have winnow.
When Shem is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, shuffle your library if you didn’t activate its swansong ability.
Swansong- GG: Search your library for a permanent card and reveal it. Shuffle your library, then put that card on top of it.
2/2
Legendary Creature- Bird Avatar (M)
Whenever an opponent casts a spell for the first time in a turn, counter that spell. That player sacrifices a permanent.
She does not trial, only error.
3/3
Scion of Succor 2RGW
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Avatar (M)
Whenever creature cards are put into a graveyard from anywhere, put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control. (If two or more creature cards are put in a graveyard at the same time, this ability triggers only only once.)
He does not feel, only comfort.
2/2
Scion of Surprise 2RWU
Legendary Creature- Merfolk Avatar (M)
Instant and sorceries you control have winnow. (If an instant or sorcery would be put into your graveyard after it's been cast, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Whenever an instant or sorcery card you own could have been winnowed but wasn't, draw a card.
She does not learn, only discover.
3/3
Scion of Selfishness 2UBR
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Avatar (M)
Whenever Scion of Selfishness attacks, you may gain control of target permanent. If you do, sacrifice a permanent.
He does not love, only lust.
3/3
#ra, Ant Queen 2BGW
Legendary Creature- Ant (M)
When #ra, Ant Queen enters the battlefield, put two 1/1 black Ant creature tokens into play.
T, Tap another untapped Ant you control, Sacrifice a permanent: Put two 1/1 black Ant creature tokens into play.
She does not add, only multiply.
2/2
Artifact- Equipment (C)
Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has "T, Unattach Lonely Tine: Lonely Tine deals 1 damage to target creature or player."
Equip 2
Aniseed Ball 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Aniseed Ball: Target creature gets -2/-2 until end of turn.
Swansong- 1G: Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Argh... ugh... blegh, that's nasty."
"You think? I quite like it."
Braindigger Teaspoon 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Braindigger Teaspoon: Target player discards a card at random.
Swansong- 1U: Draw a card. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
Brulee Torch 4
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Brulee Torch: Brulee Torch deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
Swansong- 1W: You gain 3 life. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
It caramelizes sugar beautifully, but the caramelized is too dead to notice.
Every Flavour Beans 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Every Flavour Beans: You gain 4 life.
Swansong- 1B: Draw two cards. You lose 4 life. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
"Want to know what it tastes like? No, you don't."
Gingersnap Palisade 3
Artifact (C)
Sacrifice Gingersnap Palisade: Creatures you control get +0/+1 until end of turn.
Swansong- 1R: Gingersnap Palisade deals 1 damage to each creature. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
Icing Bag 4
Artifact (U)
T: You may put a land card from your hand onto the battlefield tapped. If you do, draw a card.
Its beautiful patterns grace the terrain and bring inspiration from artistry.
Ubiquitous Gobstopper 3
Artifact (R)
Spells cost 1 more to cast.
Activated abilities of creatures and planeswalkers cost 1 more to activate.
You hold it in your eye, you hold it in your mouth. It jams itself down your throat without ever leaving its place.
Glutton's Galero 4
Artifact- Equipment (M)
Sacrifice a land: Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and gains trample until end of turn.
Sacrifice a creature: Equipped creature gains lifelink until end of turn.
Sacrifice another artifact or enchantment: Until end of turn, equipped creature can’t be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.
Equip 0
Land (C)
T: Add 1 to your mana pool.
T: Sacrifice Sprinkle Factory: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Confectionery Coast
Land (R)
Sacrifice Confectionery Coast and another untapped land: Search your library for a Plains card and an Island card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Islets of ice-cream, sands of sugar.
Cocoa Channel
Land (R)
Sacrifice Cocoa Channel and another untapped land: Search your library for an Island card and a Swamp card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
A delta of darkly delicious delight.
Caquelon Caldera
Land (R)
Sacrifice Caquelon Caldera and another untapped land: Search your library for a Swamp card and a Mountain card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Bits of burnt bread bob in a bubbling bowl of boiling brie.
Caramel Canyon
Land (R)
Sacrifice Caramel Canyon and another untapped land: Search your library for a Mountain card and a Forest card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Brûlée blowtorched by blistering breath.
Candycane Copse
Land (R)
Sacrifice Candycane Copse and another untapped land: Search your library for a Forest card and a Plains card and put them into play. Then shuffle your library.
Fluffy forests of 'floss fade into fondant fields of flowers.
Plains, Island, Swamp, Mountain, Forest
11/7/6 split common/uncommon/(mythic) rare
YOU SO TOTALLY ROCK DUDE! just imagine that the wall and smiley are turtles a la Finding Nemo.
Mafia Stats
Kill shot: BB
Issue with my shooting? Please visit my helpdesk and help me learn to aim!
Monatog 2R
Creature- Atog
R, Sacrifice a Mountain: Monatog gets +2/+2 until end of turn.
Nemira has little tectonic activity- once a toast mountain is gone, it's gone forever. The monatogs neither know or care about this.
1/2
Phoenix Drop R
Instant (C)
Target creature gets +3/+0 and gains winnow until end of turn. (If that creature would be put into its owner's graveyard this turn, he or she may put it on top of their library instead.)
A molten blob of marshmallow filling wounds and burning foes.
Wirechick Invader-Scourge 2R
Artifact Creature- Bird Berserker (C)
Double strike (This creature deals both first-strike and regular combat damage.)
Wirechicks care more for their homes than for their lives.
1/1
No common creature in Magic has been printed with straight-up double strike as of yet. For good reason?
Anyway, the only reason I'm doing so badly at designing this is because I can't be bothered to do more than like three cards at once, but this does mean that I'm more than halfway done. Very nice!
Here's a sample:
The government announced today that it is changing it's national symbol to a condom because it more acurately reflects the governments political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed.
Damn, it just doesn't get more accurate than that!
Sorcery (U)
Each player sacrifices a creature.
"The day my friend died was the worst day of my life... do ants have friends?" -Astrid, lepori knight
White Innocent Blood? Is there anything I don't totally rule at?
Kill the Unliving G
Instant (C)
Destroy target noncreature artifact or noncreature enchantment.
Wirechicks don't fear death, but they still enjoy life. To kill one without its permission is not abhorrent, merely impolite.
I'm not sure the second 'noncreature' is necessary, but I like to reduce confusion anyways. Hell, it's bound to come up at least once somewhere.
Astrid, Lonely Fighter 2WW
Legendary Creature- Rabbit Knight (R)
When Astrid, Lonely Fighter enters the battlefield, put a legendary 2/2 white Rabbit Knight creature token named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter onto the battlefield with "As long as you control no creatures named Astrid, Lonely Fighter, Tallulah gets +3/+3."
As long as you control no creatures named Tallulah, Lonely Fighter, Astrid gets +3/+3.
2/2
Holy crap that's a lot of words.
- Main Cube
- No Brains, All Feelings Cube
Caramelemental 6R
Creature- Elemental (R)
Trample
When Caramelemental is put into a graveyard from anywhere, return it to the battlefield if it dealt 4 or more damage to a player this turn.
Swansong- 4R: Caramelemental deals 4 damage to target player. (When this card is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate this ability.)
6/1
Metal Bones G
Artifact Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +2/+3.
The wirechicks feel a vague sense of protectiveness towards the lepori. The lepori are soft.
Ant
Wirechick
Blue
Rabbit
Ant
Wirechick
Black
!!
Red
Green
Ant
Creature- Rabbit Warrior (U)
When you draw Warren-Entrance Ambusher, you may reveal it and pay 2R. If you do, Warren-Entrance Ambusher deals 3 damage to target creature or player.
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
He crouches unseen in the night, the smoke irritating his eyes and the fire roasting his extremities.
3/1
Creature- Merfolk Rogue Wizard (R)
Mistress of Masquerades can't be the target of spells and abilities your opponents control.
Auras you own have"Swansong- 2W: Return target Aura card from your graveyard to the battlefield." (Whenever an Aura you own is put into a graveyard fromanywhere, you may activate its swansong ability. It can't target itself.)
She shapes others in her own image. Too bad she doesn't know what that is.
2/2
What?!
Artifact Creature- Bird Warrior (C)
Shroud, winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Candycorpse Guerrilla is unblockable.
3/1
Coward's Enabler 1U
Creature- Rabbit Wizard (U)
Creature cards you own have "Swansong U: Return target creature you control to its owner's hand."(Whenever a creature card you own is put into a graveyard from anywhere, you may activate its swansong ability.)
"Everyone deserves the right to an escape."
1/3
Soldier-Caste Extractor 4G
Creature- Ant Soldier Berserker (C)
Intimidate
The wirechicks are masters of using the jungle to their advantage. The ants are masters of tearing it down.
4/3
Glykomantic Rescaling 1U
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature is 3/3.
Whenever enchanted creature blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, that creature becomes 1/1 until end of turn.
"You think you're so big and clever!"
"Clever, certainly."
Ravenous Hunger B
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has haste and lifelink.
Spitting Oil RR
Enchantment- Aura (C)
Enchanted creature has "R: This creature gets +1/+0 until end of turn" and "T: This creature deals 1 damage to target creature or player."
"Apparently it's most dangerous when it's still. I wouldn't be staying still if I had a mouthful of boiling fat, though." -Meldo, lepori explorer
Woof!
I actually really like this idea, mostly because I have a really cool mental image of them.
Liquorice Lasher B
Creature- Skeleton Horror (C)
Winnow (If this card would be put into your graveyard from anywhere, you may put it on top of your library instead.)
Liquorice Lasher must be winnowed if able.
It drags itself forward with spindly fingers, clawing its way up from the darkest pits of imagination.
2/1